It's a compliment

92313headband2415web.jpg

I was following some comments on an Instagram post the other day...a bit of a brew-ha-ha going on over what someone said and what exactly it meant by being said...and one of the comments on the post suggested that:

"I think women with hidden low self esteem would love any one giving them a compliment at any time, for validation and ego purposes. Women who aren’t like that and don’t need a compliment from a complete stranger in a neutral environment see it as inappropriate."

"I think women with hidden low self esteem would love any one giving them a compliment at any time, for validation and ego purposes. Women who aren’t like that and don’t need a compliment from a complete stranger in a neutral environment see it as inappropriate."

Honestly; it triggered me. I took the time to dive deeper why this comment written by someone that I don't know would bother me the way it did. I tore it apart and thought "is this me?!" Am I this woman with a hidden low self esteem?? And you know what. FUCK, NO!!! I find it better if I process these shadows in my own "space" on the internet rather than sort it out online, but this is what I believe: 

Compliments are beautiful if given in honesty, joy, and authenticity. and i like to receive them.

Compliments are beautiful if they are said from a place of honesty, joy, and authenticity. And YES! I like to receive them. 

When a compliment is given joyfully, honestly, and with sincere intention I believe it creates a connection between two people. It is an energy that whispers "I understand you. I am in agreement." It is not something you "look" for to give (like the salesperson you hear that compliments everyone as they walk in the door...) it's a FEELING. 


I like to think of it as a kind of gratitude. Being appreciative or grateful for the moment and sharing and expressing that gratitude of the senses with a compliment. It allows you to be more present when the compliment is given or received. 

Compliments can start a common ground. A starting point. You like this...why do you like it? Tell me more. I don't NEED a compliment, but if it is given in sincerity, I will take it. And thank the person for being kind and generous to share their thoughts with me. And I hope that any joy I have brought to that person, can be shared ten fold with others in some way.